


When We Were Young

by witchwithdimples



Category: Call Me by Your Name - André Aciman
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst with a Happy Ending, Coming Out, Coming of Age, First Love, First Time, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Love at First Sight, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2020-12-24 16:53:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21102797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/witchwithdimples/pseuds/witchwithdimples
Summary: Armie's seventeen-years-old and his family runs a very popular breakfast diner in Hell's Kitchen, New York that has rave reviews. Armie has done a great job at just putting minimal effort in his father's diner and living up to his mother's religious ideals up until one fateful Tuesday summer afternoon when a cute French-American boy strolls in with his charming family.





	1. Nobody Told Me That You Would Be Here

This is my first fanfic and I just wanted to say how excited I am to finally be able to contribute to this fandom I love so much! I got inspired to write about it after listening to one of my favorite Adele songs "When We Were Young" and it gave me not only CMBYN vibes but Charmie vibes as well. So this fanfic is heavily inspired by the song. I hope you enjoy it! Feel free to leave comments and kudos if you do! :)

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

“Armand!” Hearing that loud, rough voice boom a few feet from the stock room I was in made me tumble on the ladder I didn’t particularly need but always grabbed because it meant going outside to the shed out back. Because it meant buying myself more time away from work. Because it meant more time away from _him_. Once I regained my balance, I felt the energy in the room shift and knew he was waiting by the doorway—most likely arms crossed with a scowl on his face. Like a character in a horror movie, too curious to not look but too afraid to sacrifice their entire body to turn completely around, I slowly shifted my head to glance over my shoulder and came face to face with the scowling, cross armed figure causing me to jump back a little. He pinched the bridge of his nose in response.

“If you’re finished with the dramatics” he waved his hand at me in annoyance “table #5 has been there for over five minutes without being waited on. Fix this.” “Yes sir.” I said respectfully—fearfully. Once he exited the room, I let out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding and reluctantly made my way through the kitchen towards the overcrowded dining area of the restaurant. I groaned when I noticed how packed it was. Sure, it was a mid-summer July afternoon, but it was also just a Tuesday. How did it get so crowded? As my eyes scanned around the room, they briefly met my Mother’s and once they did, her smile grew twice the size of her face as she made her way towards me.

“Armand! I’ve been looking for you! Where did you run off to?” I knew very well she hadn’t actually been looking for me because there was only so many places, I could hide in this 1,000 square foot hell-like Hell’s Kitchen, New York restaurant but humored her with my signature small smile. “I was just re-stocking the stockroom until Dad informed me of how busy we were. Now I’m going to wait on table #5.” She scanned my face for a moment and must have approved of what she saw because her smile returned. “Well I’ll let you get right to that then.” She pats my shoulder, waits until I give another small smile. “The smaller the smile the less forced it looks” my Dad had finally broken down and said this after watching my smile get wider and faker while dealing with a particularly rude customer. Little did he know I’d use this not just at the Iron Hammer Diner but in my daily life as well. Just like he does. _He’s trained me well_ I shivered at that thought and finally made my way to table #5.

I was expecting to be met with the “I’ve-been-waiting-here-past-five-minutes-what-kind-of-establishment-is-this” friendly New York attitude but was instead met with three pairs of kind smiles and even kinder eyes. Must be tourists. I thought to myself. “Good afternoon, my name is Armand and let me start out by apologizing for the wait—”

“No need to apologize, Armand.” The man chimes in, smiling up at me from his seat. “We could see how busy it is here and wouldn’t expect you to just abandon other tables just to get our orders. That wouldn’t be fair of us.”

I searched his face for signs of sarcasm but was only met with signs of sincerity. Yup, they’re definitely tourists. “Well I thank you all for being so understanding. Now what may I get you all to drink?”

“How are the cappuccinos, Armand?” The patriarch of the table asks.

I suck air in between my teeth and tap two fingers on my chin “Well that depends… are you Italian?”

“French.”

“In that case I think our orange juice is pretty good.”

This small table of three erupts in boisterous, laughter. The kind of laughter that draws attention from every eye in the room. I felt my face heat knowing my father was probably watching.

“Orange juice for me it is then!” The charming man finally says as his laughter dies down. Somehow the outburst had only made him look even more friendly, a feat I would have otherwise thought impossible. The older woman, I assumed to be his wife, lays a comforting hand on his arm. “It’s too late in the day for cappuccinos anyway, mon amour.” They smile at each other as he places his free hand on top of her’s and squeezes. My heart clenched at this simple, sweet gesture. More and more I’m kicking myself for making these wonderful people wait. “Alright that’s one orange juice and what would you like, ma’am?” I say, showcasing a rare genuine smile. She shines her smile right back at me, “Oh just an orange juice and water for me is fine, thank you.”

“I would like the same please!” A pretty, younger woman seated across from her exclaims excitedly.

“Of course, of course.” I beam. “I’ll get your orders back to you as soon as possi—”

As I make to leave, the older woman reaches out to stop me. “I’m so sorry, Armand, but would you mind getting us an extra water and orange juice? Our son is finishing up his acting class and will be here any moment now.” The older woman asks with eyes bluer (and somehow warmer) than the Amalfi Coast.

“I don’t mind at all but are you sure he’ll want an orange juice?” I begin to panic, realizing I just questioned a customer and fight the urge to search for dissaproving eyes. “I mean I-I don’t mind coming back and asking him once he arrives.” I gulp. Just breathe, just breathe. My nerves settle once I hear them giggle. “Oh he’ll want orange juice. Trust us.” The younger woman says. I dramatically exhale to feign exasperation with my hands on my hips, “I suppose I could trust you.” I flash a grin. “I’ll be back with those waters and orange juices momentarily.” I then hustle quickly back into the kitchen, wash my hands, grab our orange juice machine and a bag of oranges and begin squeezing them into juice as fast as fast as humanly possible. Besides, I wouldn’t want to make that lovely family wait any longer than they already have. Once I finished extracting the juice from the oranges into four glasses, I prepare the ice water, load the drinks on the tray and hurry back towards the table. As I approach my ears are immediately flooded with that laughter, I am becoming to grow more and more enamored of. I bite my lip to control the urge to smile for the 100th time in response to this family’s wholesomeness.

But all that effort to conceal gets shot to hell once the father spots me, throws up his hands and exclaims “ARMAND!” as if I’m an old friend that he hasn’t seen in ages and not their unworthy, seventeen-year-old waiter. I blush and the two women laugh and cover their faces to feign embarrassment even though they’re looking at him fondly but I notice in between the women a menu flies up to hide what must be a truly embarrassed face owned by, whom I would guess, be the son this family had been waiting for.

“Hello again.” I grin shyly as I set the drinks down then decided to put on a show. “I come bearing gifts. Only the finest and freshest squeezed orange juice for the finest and freshest family here.” I proclaim with the fakest British accent I could muster.

“Fine and fresh? My that’s a first for us I believe!” The mother chuckles.

“Speak for yourself.” The boy behind the menu said, tone pretending to be insulted. I smile in response. “Ah so you must be the orange juice-obsessed, mystery child we’ve been waiting for.” Even though his face was hidden, the ear that poked out from the sides of the “dessert” portion of the menu burnt a shade of red that not even fire could imitate. But as quickly as that ear appeared it vanished as he ducked, obviously trying to make himself smaller and unseen. The young girl smirks, so amused by the boy’s discomfort I could only assume that she was his sister. “Oh, he’s no he’s no child. Actually, he’s at that awkward cusp between man and child,” then she snapped her fingers, “a man-child! Ow!” A shuffle of feet from under the table leads me to believe the boy had kicked the girl. Yup, their definitely siblings I smirk to myself. The father gives a knowing glance between the two of them.

“Now Paulie don’t tease Timmy, he’s had a traumatic day as it is.” He says with no smile on his face, but his eyes are shining. At hearing this, oddly I felt a strong impulse to make this “Timmy” have a better day. “I’m sorry to hear your day hasn’t been going as well as you would have liked Timmy, but it’s only 12:30. You got almost half the day still and who knows, something incredible might happen to make all you went through worth it.” I watch as an ocean of brown curls appears from the top of the menu then become hidden again twice as quick and I’m absolutely enchanted. _Well this isn’t adorable at all_ I thought to myself. I then look over at the family to see if they’re watching him but they’re not. Instead their watching me… watching me and smiling. Something about the way they’re looking at me makes my face heat up several degrees. I adjust the color of my uniform and clear my throat. “Oh, uh I suppose you all might be here to eat, right?” To my relief they all four laugh. And when I mean all four, I also include the precious, wheezy laughter coming from behind the menu.

“Hm coming to a restaurant to eat, what a thought.” Paulie (maybe short for Paula? Pauline? I wondered) gleams. “I would like to order the double bacon cheeseburger with home fries, please.” My eyes widen and I chuckle from surprise at this tiny woman’s appetite. “A double bacon cheeseburger and home fries’ pairs well with the orange juice.” She gasps at that “Oh you’re right” then hands me the menu, a shine in her eye “better get me a chocolate milkshake, too.” Oh, I like her. “Another great idea from Paulie. I’ll second that but make my milkshake a strawberry, please.” His dad requests, politely. “Of course.” I smile back taking the menu from him. “Oh, I’ll just take the French Toast with a side of fresh fruit please.” The mother says, now handing over her menu. “Only the freshest.” I say as I take her menu, now turning to the only remaining menu left.

“Last but certainly not least, what would you like Timmy. He sighs and puts down the menu revealing his face and what. A. Face. It. Was. My throat constricted as if I was being strangled from the inside and chills washed over me like a baptism. These chills made everything sensitive... everything _vulnerable_ and I didn’t know if I wanted to run or wanted to bask in the wake of it all. All I kept thinking was _Thank God his eyes are closed Thank GOD his eyes are closed_ but he must’ve read my mind. Because right as the thoughts entered my brain his eyes opened up to reveal this vast emerald oasis that beckoned me from the end of my table. I gulped. “Scrambled eggs, bacon and home fries with lots of ketchup, please.” He says incredibly fast and smiles bashfully. Those chills that were just finally beginning to settle spread like an infection across my skin once more. I’ve seen so many faces come through these doors and as consequence have seen many smiles as well, but this smile wasn’t like any smile I had ever seen. Plump, pillowy lips curved by a prominent cupid’s bow flawlessly dressed in a dark shade of pink normal people can only achieve with makeup. I watch as he bites his bottom lip to suppress a nervous giggle and I realize that not only has he been trying to pass me the menu for some time now, but I had also been staring. I look down quickly and feel my face heat up hot as the rest of the table tries to suppress their amusement. “Uh right I’ll uh—yeah I’ll get those orders right up.” I choke out somehow despite not being able to breath. Despite not being able to think. Desperate for retreat, I attempt to hastily, but gently, grab the menu from this overly distracting god-like creature named “Timmy” without meeting his gaze, looking down the entire time. But not looking became a mistake, because instead of grabbing the menu… I had grabbed his hand.

... And the amount of electricity that flowed through our hands could have powered all of New York City.


	2. I Was So Scared To Face My Fears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to start out by thanking all of you for such a huge response to this fic. It meant so much to me especially since it's my first. This chapter is a bit longer than the last and for future chapters I don't think I'll make them be as long but I thought everything discussed in it was too important to split up. Besides, the quicker we get through the angst and out of the toxic diner the quicker we can get to all that fluffy stuff so ☺️

As abruptly as I had grabbed his hand I had removed it. Like his touch were a wildfire that I desperately wanted to put miles and miles behind me. But just like a wildfire, my absence of it didn’t mean the fire that blazed had stopped by my removal. And these flames burned so hot I literally felt myself sweat. My anxiety wanted me to keep my eyes down and run out of there. Not just away from the table but away from the restaurant itself as well. Runaway from the consequences that I might face from him and his family as well as my own. Yet,there was a more daring side of me that wanted to meet the gaze of this boy—to look fear into the eyes and conquer it similar to the valiant gladiators that would fight to the death in the trapped confine of the coloseum. I believed only then could this raging fire fade. So I raised my eyes, preparing myself mentally for the hostility this sort of “touch” usually brings but my eyes had found only tranquility and what appears to be a twinkle in his eyes. A twinkle that looks a whole lot like… hope. I internally shook my head at the thought. _That’s just your own hope looking back at you, _I said to myself, _no way could you have inspired such a feeling in this beautiful boy who probably has so many beautiful girls fawning over him_.

Suddenly I hear a cough and I rapidly register that, although time may have froze for me, it hasn’t frozen for anyone else and quick glance around the table confirms that. _God just kill me now. _“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to get so distracted---“ A quiet giggle from Paulie makes my eyes grow wide as I feel myself grow small. “I uh, mean I…I…I” I exhale as I hang my head low. Defeated. “ I deeply apologize for my unprofessionalism. If you wish to exchange waiters I understand.”

“Armand” I hear the mother begin.

I give her as convincing of a sincere smile as I could muster. “It’s alright ma’am, truly. We have a great staff here and I’ll make sure you all get the best we have. I’ll put your orders in now and personally make sure they look nothing short of perfect.”

“Oh we have no doubt you will Armand, but if it's alright by you we won’t be changing waiters.” The father says, smiling up at me.

“Besides”, Timmy starts but his eyes are on the table and there’s a light blush coating his cheeks, “I’m pretty sure we already have the best anyways.” The pink in his cheeks darken but I know from the heat radiating off my condition isn’t too far off from his.

“Well I don’t know if I deserve that.” I laugh, trying to mask how nervous I was. “But I will definitely try to live up to that expectation.” His eyes don’t meet mine but a slight smile appears on his face and I get this feeling like I’d go through all that humiliation all over again just to see that smile. This is a normal feeling right?

Paulie clears her throat “Good. They believe you're wonderful, he believes you're wonderful, _I_ believe you're wonderful; but I also believe I’m very hungry.”

I see Timmy shoot a glare at her with his adorable face and it reminds me so much of an angry puppy it makes me laugh. “Of course, of course! I’ll be right out with your orders as soon as they’re done.” I’m about to turn and leave until I notice Timmy’s slim fingers still holding up the menu I had yet to collect from him.

“Oh… right.” I chuckle, shaking my head at myself. He gives me a cute smile in return. As I walk towards the kitchen with this traitorous menu securely in my hands, I can’t decide whether I want to take it outside and burn it or take it home and treasure it forever.

Once I make my way back into the kitchen I clip their order slip to the line hanging above the cooks, wash my hands and begin preparing the two milkshakes absentmindedly, completely submerged in my own thoughts.

But then I hear my younger brother Vick’s voice and it completely knocks me out of my daydream. “What’s gotten to you?”

“Who me?”

He shakes his head and chuckles. “Yes, _you_. You’ve been smiling since you walked into the kitchen.” _Was I smiling? _

I scoff “I was not.”

He rolls his eyes and smirks.“You could at least take that dopey grin off your face if you’re going to deny it.”

A raise of an eyebrow from me releases a surge of laughter from him.

“Dude! You’re _still _smiling, you dingus!”

I frown at the nickname and realize by frowning that I was in fact smiling. I groan to myself. Wonderful.

“So what if I am? Am I not allowed to be happy?” I question.

His own smile fades from his face and he shrugs.“Happiness isn’t really your thing.” This made me stop cutting the strawberries for the father’s milkshake and turn towards Vick. Had I really been that obvious? I open my mouth to speak but Vick shakes his hands at me to stop me before I began. “I don’t need you to tell me what the cause of your happiness is if you don’t want to tell me, Armie. It’s just…” He looks up to the ceiling as if the words he’s trying to say are written there. “…It’s just nice to see you happy.” He gives me a sincere smile before he heads towards the sink to unload his busser tub full of dishes.

I rapidly finish cutting up the strawberries, empty them inside the blender with the milk and homemade ice cream. Once I press the button on the blender I curse under my breath. “Fuck.” All this time I had thought I was masking my real pain from Vick successfully but this whole time Vick had seen right throw the mirage. This pulled the rug right under my feet. If I couldn’t protect him from my own pain how could I possibly believe I could protect him from his? What kind of big brother am I?

I dump the milkshake in a glass and wash out the blender in preparation for Paulie’s chocolate milkshake, taking out the in-house chocolate sauce in the fridge on my way back to the station. Trying desperately to focus on the milkshake to distract me from the dark, familiar avenue my mind was headed but it was no use. I started remembering the last time I was happy. Back when I first started high school in Santa Monica and a new family had just moved in next door to us: an Italian man, his German wife along with their stunning Italian, German-mixed son, Leonardo who absolutely loathed being called Leonardo and would insist on you calling him Leo. I felt a small smirk growing on my face at the memory. We quickly became friends but unfortunately so did our mothers.

We were both in baseball, him the pitcher and myself at 1stbase. One late afternoon evening after practice he snuck me upstairs in his room where we reached 2ndbase, making out in his closet. I'm aware two boys kissing in a closet was as cliché as it comes but Leo loved the cliché. I wasn’t even completely sure I was into boys yet, since it was my first time kissing one but I wasn’t allowed much time to figure it out. Because just as quickly as it had started it had ended when the closet door flew open to both our mothers staring down at the position we were in: me hovering over his smaller body with both my hands on his shoulders and his hands on mine. Despite Leo protesting that it was consensual, our position translated to them that I was the aggressor. My mother called me every name in the book you could think of but her favorite was “faggot”. She loved reminding me of what I had done and how disgusting I am for corrupting that good Catholic Christian boy. Her abuse was always verbal and never physical but her words beat me until I was emotionally disabled. Leo was so much stronger than I was. And he still made attempts to see me despite our mothers’ objectives.

But my mother had successfully made me believe what we did…what _I _did was wrong that I avoided each attempt he had made. A few weeks later in the summer his parents had sent him to some kind of summer camp for three weeks and when he came back things were different because he himself was different. He no longer tried to pursue any kind of relationship with me and instead started dating a series of beautiful girls at our school that looked like they should’ve been runway models instead of students. I watched him date cheerleader Nina, volleyball captain Kristen, tennis champion Naomi, JV softball pitcher Erin and bookworm Miranda. The camp he was sent to appeared to have been successful in straightening Leo out quite literally so that anytime I didn’t do as my mother would like she’d threaten to tell my father of what I did so he’d send me away to the camp.

My sophomore year was the lowest I had ever been until halfway through it my mother told my father in front of my brother and I she’d finally agree to move to New York. My father had hated California since he agreed to move there to help my grandfather run his oil company and had been wanting to return back to his roots in New York and open up the diner. My mother had disagreed to it for years, not wanting to give up her fancy, high class lifestyle to move to New York and gamble with a diner. Her reason for her change in answer was clear as she stared me down the entire time she spoke. She wanted me as far away from Leo as possible. Little did she know I was looking forward to the move. I wanted so badly to runaway from all this that I thought the move would somehow finally let me rid myself of the self-hatred I felt growing inside me. Part of me even wanted for my mother to tell my father so I could get sent to that same camp Leo did in hopes of straightening out. And I believe that he truly had been cured of our shared disease… until the morning of our departure when he met me in our front lawn, safely hidden between the trees that seperated our houses. How my eyes weld up when I saw his ocean eyes pour out to me. It hit me that he was never straightened out and had been suffering just like I had.

“Please don’t go.” He begged through a shakey voice. I desperately wanted to make his tears stop, to be there for him just like he tried to be there for me. But I wasn’t as brave as he was . We left that afternoon and I silently cried the entire five-hour flight.

Once I finish making both milkshakes I loaded them on the tray and carry them out into the dining area. Who was I joking? I was no gladiator. And Timmy seemed good, _really_good. Even if he did like me, a feat I’m beginning to believe is a fantasy my mind made up, he deserved a gladiator just like Leo had deserved and not a coward like me. I knew I had to protect him from myself by being as professional of a waiter as my father had always wanted. Give the: _Here’s your milkshakes. Would you care for a refill? _and _your orders will be out shortly _but that’s all I’d give.

As I approached the table, Timmy saw me from the corner of his eye and beamed up at me, it took everything in me not to melt on sight but I somehow managed to grin back at him politely.

The older man smiled his bright smile at me “Armand! How we’ve missed you.” I blush, nervous laughter bubbling to the surface “I’m sorry to have been gone for so long that I’ve been missed.” His smile faltered with regret for his word choice and I kick myself for making the man ever lose his smile. “But I have missed you all too. So much so that I come bearing gifts.” His smile returns and I place a strawberry milkshake in front of him and the chocolate on in front of Paulie.

“Would any of you kind people like any refills or—”

“Oh my gosh this is the best milkshake I’ve ever had in my entire life.” Paulie says interrupting me with her adorable enthusiasm. The older man takes a sip of his and his eyes widden. “Wow she’s right! This is an incredible milkshake. Did you make them, Armand?”

I nod. 

“Well now that makes since, the best milkshake we ever had made by the best waiter we ever had.” He says and I’m starting to wonder if people can die from blushing too hard.

“Well I’m glad you like them.”

“_Like _is an understatment.” Paulie murmurs mid sip.

Timmy giggles. Can giggles sound like symphonies? “You both are making me wish I had ordered a milkshake.”

I look at him with large eyes, “Would you like to order one?”

He shakes his head causing his adorable curls to bounce. “Oh no, no, no. No need to stress yourself out on my behalf.”

I almost told him it was my job to stress over what he wants but I’m pretty sure he knows I’d stress over getting him what he wants even if it wasn’t.

So I laugh. “Trust me, I’d much rather stress knowing you’re happy than stress myself out thinking you aren’t.” I swallow and hope that didn’t come off as flirty as I’m hearing it played back at me.

He looks up at me fondly and struggles to suppress his grin “Oh I wouldn’t worry about that if I were you.” He brushes back an unruly curl behind his ear only for it to bounce back in place and I’ve never wanted to be a curl so bad in my life. “Besides, it gives me something to look forward to next time.”

“Next time?” I ask, utterly shocked that he’d want to come back to this diner and risk bumping into me again.

“Yes if—if that’s alright.” He asks and he seems too lose a bit of confidence, confidence I feel compelled to give it back to him.

“Of course its alright. It gives me something to look forward to, as well.” Now we’re both blushing, my own voice sounding foreign to me. When did I become so flirtacious? And when did I become confident enough to be this flirtacious?

“I’m going to go check on your food. It should be about ready.” I smile at the family before making my way back to the kitchen. Sure enough, the cook dings the bell with the happy family’s food on the warming rack. I grab each of their plates setting them carefully on the tray while also grabbing some ketchup for Timmy as well.

“I have two double bacon cheeseburgers with home fries, French toast with fresh fruit and scrambled eggs with bacon and home fries. How does that sound?”

“Freaking amazing.” Paulie exclaimes and we all laugh. “Let’s feed you first.” I say and set all of their food in front of them starting with Paulie’s. “Is there anything else you want?” They all shake their heads. “Then I hope you enjoy your meal. Feel free to holler at me if you need me.”

I spend the next ten minutes helping Tyler, another waiter and good friend of mine, carry one of his large table’s orders out to them and also help my brother bus a few tables. As I’m clearing drinks and plates off of a nearby table I notice from the corner of my eye my mother—speaking to table #5. I froze. What could she possibly be talking about? I prayed it wasn’t me. As if she sensed me staring she faces towards me, eyes full of knowing. Eyes full of judging. I try to look as innocent as possible but I already feel the guilt festering. I half-expect her to walk towards me and embarrass me by punishing me in front of them but to my surprise she turns and walks away. Once she’s out of sight I abandon the table I was bussing to table #5, trying to look calm but my heart was pounding. Before I even arrive at the table I can feel a difference in the atmosphere than what is was before. Paulie stopped eating with half her food still on her plate. I don’t know her that well, but I can imagine it must take a lot to sidetrack her from eating. I then noticed the look on their parents faces as they stare in the direction where my mother is by the hostess station. The father’s face looked neutral but the friendly shine in his face is gone. The mother however looked repulsed. I gulped. Repulsed at me? I hoped not, but then who else would she be repulsed by? Nothing could prepare me for Timmy’s face, though. It was red but this time not from blush. From anger. His eyebrows furrowed and his face scrunched up so tight I could cry. _Please God don’t let him hate me. _

“Hello, I’m just coming to check in on you all to make sure everything still tastes alright.” I don’t know how I managed to fight the overwhelming urge to just start apologizing immidiately once I got to the table but I did.

The father’s expression changed and he smiled up at me “Everything’s wonderful, Armand but would you mind bringing us the check?”

My heart dropped and face fell at this. They hadn’t even finished their food. My mind raced at what could have inspired them to want to leave so badly they didn’t even want to finish the food they were enjoying just five minutes ago.

“I’m so sorry if I made you all uncomfortable—”

The mother’s head snaps from my mother’s direction towards mine, “You have done nothing to be sorry for. You have done nothing wrong—you are _doing _nothing wrong.” Suddenly it hits me, that it wasn’t me who made them uncomfortable but my mother. I sigh and nod with relief. “

“Are you—” Timmy starts looking in my mother’s direction before he looks back at me, his voice returning in a low whisper “Are you going to be alright once we leave?” He was worried for my safety, worried for _me_. I tried to think back to a time when someone had cared enough to worry about my safety before but could find no memory. As much as my heart leapt at this I needed… I _wanted _to settle his nerves. “Oh I’ll be alright.” He doesn’t look convinced. “I cross my heart.” I say while making the gesture. He smiles in return but the worry doesn’t leave his or the rest of their faces, not when they insist handing me their card before receiving the bill or when I return the card along with the receipt. It makes me wonder what my mother must have said about me to elicit such a worried reaction from them.

As they get up to leave, I start grabbing plates in attempt to be with them as long as possible. I felt so safe with them. I didn’t want them to leave. When I reach for Timmy’s plate I start to feel emotional, thinking I might never see him again. I have to look at him one more time and get enough of a look to where I could catalog every little feature he owns so I never ever forget him. But when I look his way I find his eyes already on me.

“I’m sorry I’m asking again but are you sure you’re going to be okay? I don’t want to leave you unless I’m completely sure.”

My heart clenches at the purity of this boy and I smile. “I’ll be okay and you don’t need to be sorry, I’m not sorry.” Then I remember something. “Well actually that’s not true. I am sorry about one thing.”

He tilts his head like a confused puppy and I control the desire to pet his hair. “And what’s that?”

“Well, I’m sorry I won’t be able to make you one of my famous milkshakes.”

He bites his lip and blushes. “Do you have a pen?” I hand him the pen in my apron and he grabs a napkin, writing down his number. I look over to see my mother preoccupied getting menus out for a couple that just walked in. He hands the napkin to me.

“Would it be embarrassing of me if I text you right away?” I say it like I’m trying to be funny but I’m completely serious.

He laughs as he wraps himself with his own arms, giving himself a hug. If he’s this cute all the time we might have a serious problem. “You take as short or as long as you want. I’ll answer you regardless.”

“I wouldn’t want to keep you waiting…”

“I don’t mind the waiting.” He smiles brightly. “It gives me something to look forward to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm really making you guys earn the fluff with this sad bit but I tried to not be too much of a Debby-downer and add some cuteness. Thank God for the Chalamet's right? Please let me know how you felt about this chapter. Your opinions mean the world to me. ❤️


	3. You Sound Like A Song

From the time I watch Timmy and his family walk out the door, I make myself appear to be busy for the rest of my shift. Waiting tables, bussing tables, but my mind couldn’t be further away from this restaurant. I spent the entire rest of the afternoon contimplating how the hell I was suppose to start a conversation out with this beautiful boy. By the time my shift ended and I made it back home I was annoyingly _still _undecided. I kicked off my shoes and groaned, flopping my oversized California-King body on this undersized Queen bed. I had so many questions I wanted to ask. Questions like: What’s your favorite movie? Is acting a hobby or a career goal? Where did you get your parents and where can I find two like them? Does your hair feel as silky as it looks? What’s your favorite milkshake flavor?That’s it!

**Armie: So about this milkshake** **😏** **…**

**Armie: What kind of flavor do you want? **

Right when I send the second message I see the three dots pop up and I know he’s going to respond. Just like he promised he would.

_Timmy: You tell me_

_Timmy: You’re the expert_ _😉_

Once I get over the innitial joy of him responding my mind boggles trying to figure out what milkshake flavor Timmy might want. Would he like strawberry like his dad, chocolate like his sister or something completely different? I take a gamble and respond with my favorite.

**Armie: Something’s telling me you’re an Oreo milkshake kind of guy**

_Timmy: That’s so weird…_

Fuck… I fucked up. Right as I was about to reply ‘ha ha just kidding it’s vanilla right’ is when I hear the _swoop _sound alerting me he had texted again.

_Timmy: …that you actually knew what my favorite milkshake flavor was_

I sighed with relief. This kid is like the biggest emotional roller coaster at a theme park and I’m like a child who’s afraid of heights that cries every time but they keep getting back in line. So naturally I get back in line.

**Armie: I knew you were one of us**

_Timmy: That’s your favorite flavor, too?_

**Armie: Yup**

_Timmy: More reason to like it then._

I feel my face get hot. Is he flirting with me? While I’m trying to think of a response, suddenly I hear the floorboard outside my room creak and I tuck my phone underneath the covers. As the steps grow loader I can tell who’s steps they are and I start panicking. Did my mom tell my dad about Timmy and his family? As the door opens I see him standing in the doorway. And the first thing I notice is how uncomfortable he looks. _Oh no, she did tell him_. I start mentally preparing for the worst. _Is he going to send me to a straightening-out camp? _

“So I saw you working earlier and uh…” He says while scratching the top of his head, here it comes…

“Keep it up.” That’s all he says before he closes the door behind him leaving me utterly dumbfounded. Well that wasn’t what I was expecting at all. I shake my head out of my confused state and get back to Timmy.

**Armie: When can I see you again?**

**Armie: So I give you that milkshake and not because I’ve been thinking about seeing you again since you walked out the door of the diner of course.**

This second chance of life has me feeling confident. But the longer it takes him to respond the quicker that confidence begins to fade.

_Timmy: What about tomorrow?_

Looks like my confidence gets to live another day.

**Armie: What time, what place and what size milkshake?**

_Timmy: 11:00am, Hell’s Kitchen Park, and hold the milkshake. _

**Armie: That sounds great but are you sure on the milkshake?**

_Timmy: Yeah _

_Timmy: I need you to have a reason to see me a third time._

I frown at this. Isn’t he enough of a reason?

**Armie: Bold of you to assume I need a reason**

_Timmy: I like the insurance you know, just in case _

Just in case what? In case I don’t like him? I want to tell him he doesn’t need the insurance, that if he wanted to see me there’s nothing that could keep me from getting to him but then I realize how stalkerish that sounds and it becomes pretty clear that I’m probably the one that’ll end up needing to use the insurance.

**Armie: Fine but only because the insurance works both ways and we both know I’ll need it more than you will**

_Timmy: Excuse me sir I’m pretty sure I told you back at the diner that you had nothing to worry about._

**Armie: I’ll believe it when you do **

_Timmy:_😂

_Timmy: Touché_

We keep the conversation going for hours. Talking about nothing by talking about everything. I find out that acting is more than just a hobby and even more than just a career choice it’s a passion. His dream is to headline broadway one day but he doesn’t want to get his hopes up. I’ve never seen him perform, but something tells me he’s better than he’s letting on. I tell him about my dream of being a major league baseball player. This led him tell me if I was only allowed to play for the Yankees. Which made me laugh. After a while I felt myself dozing off and checked the time to find it was 3 AM. Where had the time gone?

**Armie: Listen I wanna keep this up but I’m starting to drift off** **😔**

**Armie: Talk tomorrow?**

_Timmy: I’m glad you said something just now I was literally about down three red bulls to stay up_

_Timmy: So I could talk about the Yankees not because I like talking to you of course_

I’m really starting to love when he plays back things I’ve said at me.

**Armie: Three??? **

_Timmy:_😇

_Timmy: I wanted to make sure I stayed up_

My heart clenched at this. 

**Armie: Well I’m glad I stopped you**

_Timmy: Me too. Goodnight, Armand_

**Armie: Sweet dreams, Timmy.**

When morning came I could barely contain my excitement. I was going to get to see Timmy again today. I start kicking myself for not setting an alarm clock because the decision on what to wear is taking much longer than I thought it would. I end up choosing a white t shirt, plain black hoodie and tan shorts but immidiately regret my decision once I make it out of the apartment building where the 80 degree heat not-so subtly reminds me its July. I have half a mind to run back up and change but the risk of running into my mother and her telling me “Not to do anything Jesus wouldn’t do” outweighed the reward of cooler clothing. _At least I’m wearing shorts _I think to myself. Luckily the park is just a five minute walk so I didn’t have too much time to doubt but it turned out I didn’t need more than five minutes to completely doubt everything.

But once I catch sight of him all my doubts turn to smoke. There he was; sitting on a nearby bench in a dark blue denim jacket, matching dark denim jeans, a black polo underneath that denim jacket paired with the whitest sneakers I’ve ever seen and I swear he’s what the poets have been trying to capture into words since the dawn of literature because he is absolutely, positively… _Breathtaking_. Literally so breathtaking, that when he turns his head up he giggles and has to remind me to actually breathe. When I dramatically gasp for air, we both burst into laughter.

“Great”, I groan rubbing my eyes. “As if I wasn’t nervous enough around you already.” He stops laughing and smiles bashfully up at me through dark eyelashes. “I’m glad I’m not the only one.”

I study him, trying desperately hard to keep my stare fixed on his face. “You don’t seem all that nervous.”

He rocks back on his heels and chuckles. “My heart’s pounding like a jackhammer.” Then he pauses and shifts his gaze back to my eyes, biting his lip as if he were weighing ideas in his mind. I’m so entranced by the look on his face that I hardly even notice his hand reaching for mine until his hand is actually in mine. The sensation sends jolts of electricity throughout my body making me shiver. A shiver he must have felt, because he bites his lip harder most likely to surpress the smile blooming on his face. “I just want to show you we’re on an even playing field. Is that okay?” I nod but only once, because right as my head comes back up, he lays my hand flat on his chest. He wasn’t kidding, his heart was pounding hard against his chest… against my hand. I close my eyes and try to calm my own heartbeat so I can memorize his. _Da-dum, da-dum, da-dum, da-dum. _The sound reminded of a time when I had walked out of a concert arena to get some refreshments and even though my ears were away from the music, I could still feel the vibrations of the music through the floor. Then it registered to me that that’s what his heartbeat was. Music. His own music that he was sharing _with me_and I don’t think I have ever heard a more beautiful song in my life until suddenly the song switches and I hear the next one play and it’s much quicker, different but beautiful all the same. _Ba-da-dum! Ba-da-dum! Ba-da-dum! _This song is so much louder it makes me wonder what could have changed that soft R&B to this high tempo hip hop? Then it hits me. _Oh. _I snap my eyes open to find him gapping at me, his pink lips seperated from each other to form a perfectly imperfect circle. All the green in his eyes turned black and the moonlight of his skin turnt bright pink with my large hand still splayed on his chest, taking up the entirty of it. _How long had we been standing like this? _I quickly take my hand off and look down at him apologetically. “I-I wasn’t trying to be weird I—” _Gulp._“I w-was just trying to hear the music I was feeling—” My eyes grow wide as I watch the pink in his face turn bright red and his bottom lip dissapear in between his teeth. _Wasn’t trying to be weird? What could be weirder than what I had just said?? _It might have been better to have been a pervert instead of some freak trying to memorize his heartbeat like a serial killer. The only thing I could think of was getting the hell out of there as quickly as possible. I turn about halfway when he suddenly reaches for me “Wait—” but the reach was too far from him and the next thing I see is him free falling to the sidwalk. I quickly lunge at him, catching just before he faceplanted the ground. Sighing with relief, I lifted him up by his armpits to his feet. I let go of him but his grip was still on me, holding onto the sleeves of my black hoodie for dear life. He looks up at me, the rising sea of his green eyes just on the cusp of purging, “Please don’t go.” He says through a shaky voice and it _broke _me. It broke me because all I could think of was how Leo had once said the same thing to me with a voice just as pleading right before I did go. I can’t do that again… I **won’t **do that again.

“Okay, I’ll stay.” I say, rubbing his shoulders in comfort. “As long as you still want me to stay I’ll stay.”

“If you wait for me to tell you to leave then you’ll never leave.” He says through adorably intoxicating laughter.

“I guess I’ll never leave, then.” I smile.

He stops laughing and we stare at each other for a good minute. It takes someone shouting at us to get a room for me to realize we’ve been just standing out in the open holding each other for quite sometime now. He laughs at what I can imagine is a hilariously mortified expression on my face and rubs my arms with both his hands.

“Come on let’s go.” I follow him willingly but he grabs my arm, as if he’s worried I’d try to make a break for it again. I want to tell him not to worry. I wanted to tell him I’m tired of running, not just from him but from myself as well. We make it past the park before I realize I have absolutely no idea where he’s taking me. I just completely gave him my trust without an extra moment’s thought. He could be a cannibal for all I know and is taking me somewhere quieter to chop me up. The sad thing is I don’t even think I’d put up a fight. Being his, even if it’s just his next meal, sounds like a step up from being literally anything else. Plus with all the meat on me I could feed him for days. I look at him from behind and smirk, _plus he looks like he could gain a little weight_.

“You’re so quiet back there.” he says turning around and I turn beat red because he totally just caught me checking him out. He busts out laughing. “Oh that’s why.” He turns back around and changes up his walk, swaying his hips a little more than before. I scoff, “Tease.” He laughs in response and I’m really starting to wonder if it’s this easy for everyone—or if he’s just so charismatic flirting just comes naturally to him.

“Aren’t you going to ask me where I’m taking you?”

“I was” I begin, picking up my pace so we walk side by side “but I decided to trust you instead.” I watch his bottom lip dissapear in between his teeth again and I’m starting to wish he wouldn’t do that because its getting harder and harder to resist the urge to grab his chin and stroke his upper lip with my thumb until it’s lower half reappears again.

“You’re staring.” He smirks, still facing forward.

“You make it hard not to.”

He shifts his eyes to me then away. Looking away quick enough to make me wonder if I had made him feel uncomfortable. Right as I start to regret what I said, I notice his hand slowly feel its way from my elbow to my hand. It’s a simple touch but intimate enough that only thing I’m left regretting now is wearing this damn hoodie instead of something short sleeved. When his fingers finally brush my wrist I feel us both shudder. He hesitates but it doesn’t take long before his determined, slender fingers are on the move again with a touch so light against my palm it almost tickles. Not being able to take it anymore, I grab his hand, intertwining his fingers in mine. I look down at our hands. Despite the difference in the length and width of our fingers our hands fit perfectly. _We fit perfectly. _I look up at his face to find him looking at mine. A smile appears on his beautiful face before he returns facing forward.

“There goes that jackhammer again.”

“Actually it’s Armie Hammer.”

He raises an eyebrow at me. And I laugh.

“My name. It’s Armie Hammer.”

This makes him laugh too. Then he stops, “Wait I thought your name tag said ‘Armand’.”

“It did because my parents absolutely refuse to call me ‘Armie’.”

He nods. “Armie Hammer it is then…” I wait for him to realize and when he does its beautiful because when his neck snaps back to face me his eyes are wide and his moth is in a perfect pink little ‘o’.

“Wait Armand Hammer?”

“Yup.” I pop the ‘p’.

“Like the…” He snickers and I smile bigger at the sound.

“…Baking soda?” I finish for him. “Yeah.”

“I’m just surprised because didn’t think your parents had—"then he stops and I watch as he cringes at himself for what he was about to say.

“…a sense of humor?” I finish for him and he looks up at me apologetically. I smile at him reassuringly and give his hand a gentle squeeze. “It’s fine, Timmy. It surprises me still to this day.” I watch him exhale, obviously relieved I wasn’t offended. I shake my head at the idea of anyone being able to be offended of a puppy like this.

“So I’m guessing ‘Timmy’ is short for something unless your parents just named you ‘Timmy’.”

He chuckles “Of course its short for something, Armie! Who would just name their child ‘Timmy’?”

I nudge him with my shoulder. “Parents with a sense of humor.”

He smiles at that. “Timmy short for Timothée.”

I stop walking. Confused at why we stopped he turns to face in front of me, our hands still linked.

“You’re French?”

“Only half of me.”

“Can you speak it?”

He rolls his eyes and smirks, obviously realizing where this conversation is going. “Fluently, why?”

I walk towards him closing the gap between us, the movement causing his smirk to dissapear from his face and his breathing pickens up. “What would you tell me if I asked you to say something French?”

His eyes move from my eyes, to my lips and back to my eyes.

“I’d tell you…”

He removes our hands but before I could miss the touch he places both his hands on my chest and I think I like this better.

“…non.” He smirks with a French accent.

I must be ogling at him, because he ducks his head from view and with a tug of his hand we’re walking again.

“Just a few more blocks” he says after a few more seconds past and I honestly don’t care if he’s a cannibal or not. My heart is his, if he has the stomach for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm excited for next chapter is all I'm going to say...😇


	4. You're Like A Dream Come True

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timmy takes him somewhere they can be alone. Fluffiness occurs along the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting to sound like a broken record but thank you again for the response to this fic and I hope this chapter brings you as much joy as the last three. I also apologize that it took a bit longer for me to update than it had previously but I hope I made up for it 😉

The next few blocks we walked hand in hand, every once and a while stealing a glance at each other. When we lingered too long in the stare, we’d playfully catch each other by returning the glance usually paired with a crooked grin or soft laugh. Not a word was said but there wasn’t one worth speaking. Our actions screamed things that words could only whisper.

As we turn a corner, the realization of where we are heading hits me. I turn back to him to find him smiling up at me knowing I’ve found him out.

“I hope you don’t mind. I just needed to grab something I left here. Plus, I figured it’d give us a quiet place to talk.”  
“Oh I don’t mind, but I am a little upset.”

He hits me with that puppy-tilt, puppy-face duo and I don’t know how I survive it. “Upset…? Why?”

“Because we’ve been going to the same school this entire time and I had never ran into you once.”

Every inch of his face lit up like the night sky on New Years’ Eve.“We go to the same school? Really?!” Then something glazed across his face that looked a lot like worry. “Then is this okay?” He says slightly swaying our laced hands.

I ponder this. Is it okay? It definitely _feels _okay, more than okay. Incredible. Every time his hand so much as moves in mine it creates jolts of electricity, bringing my hand and the rest of me to life. But I have to think rationally about this. Other than my brief, blurred-lined friendship with Leo and our even more brief make-out session in his closet, I haven’t really had enough experience with my own sexuality to know what I want yet. And even though I know I want Timmy without a doubt in my mind I also know its not fair to the both of us to parade around something so fresh. But I also don’t want to offend him by thinking I’m ashamed of holding his hand. Especially since I’m not ashamed. There’s something in the way he makes me feel that makes me want to be brave; a feeling I’ve never felt before. Suddenly, for the first time I feel as strong on the inside as I look on the outside and now I fear I’ll lose it all just by being honest with him. I gulp and like a broken dam I release my response in a flood of words, “Would it be alright if we take it slow? It’s not because I don’t ever want to be seen holding hands with you or anything but I just need time to know what I want but if it offends you fuck it because I’d rather risk it all than have nothing and I—”

“Armie, Armie!” He shakes his head and laughs. Then he looks up at me, his bright smile reaching his eyes as he comfortingly squeezes my hand. “I don’t mind going slow.”

I sigh with relief. “Really?”

He squeezes my hands again. “Really. I’ll never push you to do something you aren’t ready for. I want you to feel safe with me because you are safe with me.” He wants me to feel safe? _Me?_

I grab both of his shoulders making him tense up. He can hear his breath shudder as I bend over to get a good look at him, studying him hard. “Are you real?”

His eyes widden until he errupts into another adorable fit of giggles. His joy is contagious and I surrendered to it.

“What?”

He shakes his head, still bubbling up laughter. “I was just thinking the same thing about you.”

“Me?”

He rolls his eyes. “Yes _you_, noodle.” Noodle?

“Did you really just call me noodle?” I ask, unable to hide my amusement and he nods, grinning ear to ear. He’s obviously very proud of the nickname.  
Now its my turn to roll my eyes. “Are you going to be this cute the entire time?”

He shrugs and walks on, knowing I’ll follow him. “I definitely hope you think so.” Something tells me he’ll have no problem with that.

A few moments into our continued walk to the school pass and I already miss the comforting shelter of his touch. It doesn’t help that I can see his delicate yet very masculine hand swaying softly by his side. In no way is it trying to tempt me but its tempting all the same. When did I become so desperate for even just the simplist affection? I could blame it on Timmy, but part of me knows he’s only responsible for feeding me what I’ve been deprived of for so long. Internally, I probably always craved it. Just a gentle touch to make me feel that maybe just maybe I’m worthy of feeling…

Loved._Loved? _This thought worries me. Have I really been so deeply affected by this boy that I’m already willing to put all my chips in; ready to gamble on a relationship that is otherwise still unlabeled? There’s no way I could be. Not yet anyway. Not when just the thought of holding hands as we walk throughout the school hallways puts me on the edge of panic. However, despite the overwhelming fear that consumes me my fingers still find themselves reaching for his. I end up having to ball my hands into fists in order to prevent them from finding his. I have to remind myself that I don’t know what it is Timmy and I have but what I do know is whatever it is we have I don’t want to ruin it by moving to fast. I have to be patient because he’s worth being patient for.

When we approach the security at the school and hand them our IDs I half expect them to glance between us and give some sort of look of judgement but they just scan our IDs and send us through the metal detector. I’m about to continue walking when the security guard yells out my name. I pause, and feel the blood reach up to my neck. _They know, they know._

“Your ID.” Oh. I give him an embarrassed “Thank you” and take my ID. Once we’re out of earshot Timmy whispers “Are you okay?” with a look of concern dressed across his face.

“Yes I’m okay.” But when my eyes meet his I can see he doesn’t look convinced and I don’t blame him because not even I’m convinced. Suddenly, I hear a familiar, maternal voice breakthrough the panic. _“You’re not doing anything wrong”_I can tell by the tenderness found even in this firm tone that it isn’t my mother’s voice but Timmy’s.

I sigh, close my eyes and tell him while reminding myself; “I’m not doing anything wrong.”

Something about that made him smile. “No.” He leans in, close enough for me to feel his breath on my neck “Not a single thing.” When I started to feel the sting of tears I turned my head away but the words keep playing over and over again and its making it harder and harder for me to hold them back. _“You’re not doing anything wrong. You’re not doing anything wrong.”_

Just as I start to feel myself let go to the last ounce of strength I have left to hold back tears, I feel a soothing hand on my shoulder and it gives me all the strength I need to push away those tears. My eyes search for him to find him looking up at me fondly. “You’re safe with me, Armie.”

I hault abruptly and in response so does he, our eyes never leaving each other. He’s only a few steps in front of me and I close that space between us. I watch as his gentle smile dissapears to this change in distance. He looks as if he’s been running, sounds like it too. Shaky breaths leaving and entering through those pink lips he keeps wetting with an even pinker tongue. And it makes me wonder how pink they’d get once they’re touched, how pink they’d get once their kissed. I know we should wait, I know _I _should wait but I want him to know its not all just him. I want him to know his feelings are safe with me too. So I reach for him and cup each side of his face with each one of my palms, completely engulfing each cheek with their mass. His eyes close tightly and his breathing stops. I lean in, breath hitting his rosy mouth. He gasps at the contact and slips from me. I wrap an arm around Timmy’s waist and hear him curse under his breath. Before I could apologize he lifts his head and lunges for my lips. _His knees must’ve given out_. With one arm still supporting him I stop his hungry lips with my free hand softly gripping his chin. Timmy’s breathing spikes again and the sound is so arousing I’m wondering if I’m too far gone to kiss him but with the way he’s pressed against me I can tell he’s in a similar state. As my mouth begins to open, I feel something wet tease across my lips, causing me to shiver._Did this kitten just lick me? _And that was it. My lips found their way to his and close around his bottom lip, lightly pulling the lip until freed. But it didn’t remain free for long. Timmy grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me closer until our lips were on each other again, his tongue sweeping in between my mouth begging for entrance. I let him in and our tongues began to dance in and out of each other’s mouths until it wasn’t clear where he ended and I began. I’ve never been so lost in a kiss before. That’s why when the A/C kicks on with a loud gurggling sound and startles us we both end up laughing. Timmy rests his forehead on my chest and I hold him breathing in his scent.

“I almost forgot where we were for a second.” He says, still catching his breath.

I nod, “Me too.”

After another passing moment he looks up at me, a nervous look in his face. “I hope you don’t…” he bites his lip “regret this… us.”

I shake my head and hold his chin in my hand until his eyes meet mine. “Do you even know how happy you just made me?”

He bites his lip and shakes his head.

I chuckle. “Of course you don’t know.”

I sigh and gaze above him. “I don’t actually remember a time when I was this happy before… as shitty and depressing as that sounds.”

I can feel him starring up at me. “Were you sad before?” The worry in his voice alarms me and the need to soothe his nerves becomes overwhelming but I didn’t want to lie. Not to Timmy.

“Only at first but then I pushed it all aside. I was so afraid to feel everything that I didn’t allow myself to feel anything. I know it doesn’t sound healthy but it was the only way I could keep going. I was content to go on forever like that, numb to the world until you came along.” I smile down at his blushing face.

“Me?”

I roll my eyes. “Yes _you _nugget.” He adorably scrunches up his nose at the nickname.

“Did you really just call me Nugget?”

I smooth out his scrunched nose with my finger and nod, smiling all the while.

“Would it be too much for me to say I want to be there for you every time you’re sad from now on?”

“No.” I laugh shyly, rubbing one of my reddening cheeks. Then I thought about it. “No it’s not too much for you to say but it _is _impossible for you to do.”

He does that head tilt thing I’m loving more and more each time he does it. “Impossible? How so?”

I shrug and smile, “Because if you’re with me I have no reason to be sad.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some schools stay opened during the summer for summer courses, activities and such if you were wondering why these dorks are going to school in mid July 😂 They're actually going to a place in particular that will be important later on. 😇  
Your feedback means all the difference in the world to me so let me know how you felt about the chapter if you have time and I promise these two soft boys will be back with more cuteness shortly. STAY TUNED 🐰❤️🐰


	5. It Makes Me Reckless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timmy and Armie are about to have a moment until they are rudely (and hilariously) interrupted. Drama (and possibly jealously) later ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY the closer finals are coming up the more difficult it's becoming to time manage but I'm hoping to update more regularly once finals finally come to an end.  
I added some characters to this story and maybe also a romantic rival👀 I know... the audacity! I hope you enjoy!

_This shouldn’t be so easy. _

I remember thinking this as Timmy lead my by the hand down the narrow High School hallways. Jt was summer. I was at school. Holding hands. With a boy. It was one thing to hold hands on the busy New York streets amongst strangers but a whole other thing to hold hands at a school, risking the chance someone might notice us… notice me. I gulped. My heart was pounding so fast I could feel it in my ears but not once did I let go of his hand. Not even when two jocks ran passed us and waved only to slow down to take a double look at us, obviously just realizing that we were joined by the hand. Not even when my Pre-Calculus teacher, who was drinking his coffee while shuffling through his pockets for his keys, choked on his hot beverage the moment he looked up. No, not even then.

After I was caught with Leo, my mother showed me graphic photos and videos of what other people do to same-sex couples giving very public displays of affection. _“This could be you if you keep sinning like this”_she’d scold as my eyes stung with tears that I wouldn’t let fall. Even in a liberal city like New York it didn’t necessarily garrauntee safety. My mother pointed out very blantedly that all of the crimes she’d shown me were in New York, sometimes in broad daylight on a crowded street. One assault was even in Times Square and people walked right on by. That could’ve been Timmy and I. This thought causes an surge of emotions to erupt but the feeling isn’t fear, not even disgust. It’s rage. I take a quick glance at Timmy’s angelic face, imagine that unblemished, snow white skin colored purple by bruises like the men in the photos and become overwhelmed with a sense to protect him from the world. So with every student and faculty member that brushed past us I’d clench my free fist, preparing for a fight. But each time, much to my surprise…

Nothing happened.

_This shouldn’t be so easy. _

We made one more turn when I realized that our hallway ended. I gulped. _A dead end_. I’ve heard about assaultors trapping same sex couples at dead ends before. _That has to be it. _Preparing for an ambush, I whip my head over my shoulder…

“Armie?”

…only to find no one there.

_This shouldn't be so easy._

“Armie.”

I snap back around to find the greenest eyes shining up at me with concern, a worried lip in between teeth.

“Sorry.” I breathe. “I just.. uh… panicked there for a second.” I huff a laugh mostly at myself for managing to overreact (yet again) but also partially to ease his worried eyes and lip. With this, his bottom lip reappeared but his eyes shun the same green, worried shade. He turns away. Brows furrowed. Lips pursed. Thinking.

“If this” he waves our hands “is too much—”

I don’t even let him finish.

“No I mean _yes_. I admit it’s… a lot but not in a bad way.”

His lips smoosh together, making him look rather annoyed in the most adorable way possible.

“Are you trying to tell me I overwhelm you _but__in a good way_?” He spat out the last part of his sentence with enough disbelief in his tone I might as well have been trying to convince him that _no, Timmy! Mermaids DO really exist! _

Judging by the face he’s giving me right now I might have a better chance convincing him about mermaids.

“Yes all this” I wave our joined hands “is overwhelming but it also is a good thing for me, Timmy. It’s a good thing that I still do something even if it scares me. It’s a good thing that I don’t want to hide how I feel anymore. It’s a good thing that after seventeen years I finally am being brave. Of course it’s going to be overwhelming at first but it _is _good for me Timmy and I know it is because it’s a feeling caused by you and you yourself are good.”

He exhales and with his breath all the tension evaaporates to reveal a much softer expression on his face. “Well I guess I’ll buy that.” He says with a quirk of his lip.

“Good.” I reply. Then I step forward and look around this dead end hallway we’re standing in. He turns and faces in the same direction.

“Now this is a nice dead end. I can see way you dragged us to the high school in the middle of summer just to show me.”

He cocks up an eyebrow and smirks. “Hm. Funny, but this isn’t what I “dragged” you here for.” He said, using his fingers to express the quotation marks.

“Oh?”

He shakes his head slowly, curls swaying in the act.

“Then what is?”

As he opened his mouth to speak the door to our right swings open and before I knew it a blonde girl wearing a mens costume straight out of the 1800s rushes out with her arms spread wide.

“PONY!”

“Wait Saoir--_Uuumph!” _Is all Timmy could get out before he girl tackles him to the ground as two more girls jump on top of the both of them, rolling around the ground in a fit of giggles. Timmy’s head pops out like a daisy somewhere in the middle of the human pile and he gasps for air until a very pretty brunette drags him back down in the pile.

“You’re squishing me!”

“Are you calling us fat? How rude!”

“Yeah if we’re fat it’s because we had to eat TWICE the pizza since your skinny fat ass missed the lunch buffet.”

“Flo! Don’t you remember? Timmy was so, so very busy this afternoon.”

“The ten years I’ve known you I’ve never seen you miss an opprotunity for free food.”

“Yeah what was _so _important you were willing to miss food for it, huh?”

I guess that’s my cue.

“Hello.”

The girls’ heads pop up all at once and face towards me, mouths falling open at the instant their eyes meet mine. Suddenly, they all scurry up and pull Timmy up with them only to surrond him in a huddle of hilariously loud whispers.

“Who’s the Adonis?”

“Timmy are you on a date?”  
“With a Greek God? Timmy you _minx_!”

“Are you hitting that?”

“_Flo! _He’s a lil baby virgin remember?”

“Lil baby or not if you had sex already without telling us I’ll sit on you again!”

“Of course he’s still a virgin! If he was hitting that Timmy would be on bed rest for _days_.”

My face is burning. I didn’t think I needed a confidence boost that these girls were giving me.

The brunette glances at me over her shoulder but she retreats quickly with her eyes open wide and cheeks painted pink. “Oh my gosh _guys _I think he hear’s us!”

“Of course he hears you! Where’d you all learn to whisper? A rock concert?!” Timmy whines. The group of girls break up the huddle and turn to face me. Timmy covers his face with his hands but through the cracks of his fingers I can see his white skin is flushed pink.

I clear my throat. Time to use the charm I’ve learned from a year of customer service.

“I’m sorry to dissapoint you all but I’m not Greek or holy by any means. I’m just a mortal soul with an even more ridiculous name than Adonis.”

They all looked at each other. “What is it?” The shorter blonde named Flo asked.

“Armie short for Armand short for Armand Hammer.”

They all snickered.

“Your parents must hate you—ow!” Timmy had removed his hands from his face to elbow the tall blonde in the ribs.

“It’s fine Timmy.” I say, giving him a reassuring smile. “I used to hate my name which is one of the reasons I go by Armie but I will say, it is a good way to break the ice.”

They nood in agreement, then the brunette gives me an inquizitive look. “So are you two” she waves a finger at me and Timmy “on a date.”

I smile fondly at Timmy before I returned to her gaze. “Yes we are.”

“TIMMY!” They all scream turning to him.

“Your first date and you bring him _here?_” The taller blonde asks with her arms crossed.

“Yeah that’s pretty lame, Timmy.” Flo agreed.

“I left my wallet in my stage locker.” Timmy says shrugging “Plus I wanted him to meet ya’ll too. Weird I know.”

Their faces soften. The brunette girl ruffles Timmy’s hair once before walking up to me and extending her hand.

“Hello Armie, I’m Emma.”

I shake her hand.

“Saoirse.” The tall blonde says as I shake her hand too.

“Florence.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet all of you.” I mean it.

“Likewise.” Saoirse says and I can tell by the smile on her face she means it too. Then the smile fades and she faces Timmy.

“You two should go.”

Timmy raises his eyebrows at her. “What why?”

“James is here.” James? Who’s James?

Whoever James is the name alone makes Timmy’s already pale skin turn even paler.

Emma puts a hand on Timmy’s shoulder and rubs it. “Timmy? Are you okay.”

“I’m fine.” He whispers, gulps but we can all tell he’s not fine. Who is this James and why does just the sound of his name make Timmy tense up? Part of me wants to stay and find out, size up this “James” and see what he’s all about. But there’s another part of me that worries. Worries that maybe James is an old flame or Timmy’s, a crush even. _What if he’s better than me… better for Timmy?_I have the sudden impulse to grab Timmy and get the hell out of there.

“Timmy you need to go.” Florence speaks loud enough for it to get through to Timmy but soft enough not to startle him.

“I—I need to go in and get my wallet.”

“I’ll go with you.” I say, trying to not make myself look as concerned as I feel but I must be failing because Emma looks me up and down and shakes her head “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

“It’s fine Armie.” Timmy says, rubbing at his throat up and down again. “I’ll go by myself.”

“Tim…” I begin but before I can finish I hear a high pitched male voice coming from the doorway.

“Well, well if it isn’t my favorite French delicacy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A cliffhanger but don't hate me too much please!


End file.
